Monday, July 6, 2009

Let the Goosh Begin

A Fairly Fargone Self Portrait....

What a week. I said I wouldn't have a gooshy post about my birthday but it was bound to happen. I think this one could have been the best. Better than the lapdance from a stripper named Maria with loose morales. Better than the threesome after the box of wine. Better than meeting a past fling at a gas station. Drunk. At eleven a.m.

I've matured since then, obviously.

Sarah Kat and I have perfected the drunky hug


I can assure you I was showered with more love and affection than I think words can describe. And I'm a shitty writer with a lot of words in my pocket. Facebook messages, tweets, blog comments, cell phone texts all reasons I love being a social networking slut because the well wishes rained.

I got flowers not once but twice. Neither from a boyfriend but I wouldn't have had it any other way. Chocolate cake during the lunch hour complete with chocolate frosting (which proved to be a late bar snack)from Jessica the Wondergoddess. Friends coming as far from Kelowna and Vancouver to celebrate with babysitters arranged and work schedules balanced. The cutest purse I've ever laid eyes on (to be seen in future posts) golf clubs, fashion, cards that fit to a "t". Oh and a beach bag that reeks of hilarity. A visit from Bachelor #1 (Bachelor #2 is officially dead to me. Don't ask.) with a personal present (wink wink) and a promise to take me skydiving this summer. Nuts!

Two girls. One t-shirt. Great Canada Day.

A new little black dress courtesy of the best wife ever. A trip down the river and a beer garden and dancing to a drum beat around the solstice circle and fireworks (okay, technically these had more to do with Canada Day, but whatever). The laptop I gave myself as a present after not having a laptop for a week. Due to me giving it a christening with an 2ltr Wendy's iced tea. Oooooops.


Dinner and drinks and sparklers in brownies and iced cream and desserts. Enough Starbucks cards to last me...a month. And feed my Subway addiction. And the drinks. Oh dear god, the drinks. Ceasars and margaritas and shooters I've never heard of in my years of bartending.

Dancing. Flirting. Smoking cuban cigars. Hugs, photos. Hottubing. No swimmies allowed. Guys having a peen measuring contest in the hottub. Not looking at it. Seriously. I thought they just did that in the locker room. And there was almost a Bachelor #2 (#2 the sequel?) but a heads up to bachelors it's best not to hit on a girl and then two seconds later to grab her friends number. That is just bad form.


Yeah, my beach gear has street cred. And bows. Got a problem with that?


Realistically any time I ever complain about being lonely, I need to just turn to this post as I don't know when I've had that much fun in ages and felt so cared for. I have the best friends. I have the best family. I have tons to be grateful for....

The wife got me a plate with dividers so my foods don't have to touch. That's love.

But seriously, what drunkenly possessed me to finish the salmon burger that was left in the car for 7 hrs after dinner is beyond me. Friday was the grossest day of my life.

21 comments:

Jack said...

Dirty food is clearly the best food. I pride my robust immune system on a unique 3 minute rule. If something falls on the floor, most people have the 3 second rule. I take that a step further.

8 hours though? I salute you.

Organic Meatbag said...

Wow! Sooooo... what did you do on your birthday?

Anonymous said...

Wow! If anyone in my life loves me, get me a divided plate!

You deserved everything that was given to you, ya sweetheart child!

Amber said...

Sounds like you had a fabulous time, which is to be deserved on a birthday!

Reading about you eating that salmon burger made me puke in my mouth just a little!

little erin said...

ha! it looks like you had an awesome birthday! so happy for you!

Hillary said...

I need that divided plate. NEED!

Anonymous said...

I was going to buy you a special diveded plate! But Leanne beat me to it. :( Totally rad beach bag by the way...
Love Lisa xxxx

rachaelgking said...

I could use about 8 drunky hugs right now, please.

You seemed like the girl to come to. ;-)

Maxie said...

are those perioges? They are my fave!

Andy said...

OMG! I hate it when my food touches with other kinds of food!! I need a plate with dividers too.

PS. I just told my mom and she was like "Next time, eat in dip plates".
Sucker.

Unknown said...

Jack-the twenty second rule is alive and well in my house.

Organic meatbag-LOL. The summary is enough :P

Kelsey-back at you, and I'll get you a divided plate next year.

Amber- sadly I can say the same...

Little Erin- thanks!

Hillary- I'm going to enquire where it came from...

Lisa- awww well thanks for thinking of me anyways, love!

Lilu- I have about 8 drunk hugs and a grope waiting for you ;)

Maxie- if you're ever here I'll make you some with bacon and onion and sour cream.

Andy- that, is a great idea!

Random Musings said...

I loved this post.. but all I can think about are perogies...

Your bag rocks

PorkStar said...

salmon burger????..... what?

Sarah K said...

Your tales of the hottubbing portion of the evening make me glad that I left....

Was Bachelor #2 the sequel who I'm thinking it might have been? Or was that someone else?

Wanderlusting said...

LOL I love your posts. Kamloops was a pretty messy time for me - even more so on my bdays (I had two there) - so I know where you are coming from! That divided plate is pretty sweet too.

Lad Litter said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lad Litter said...

Surely all that was spread over a week or two? No? Wow! Happy birthday and happy Canada Day too.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

First and foremost, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

AWWWW Megs, that sounds like the bestest day ever, with all the love shining.

You must certianly be derserving of all that adulation!
But somehow, I think I already knew that;)

I'm so glad you had a great one. Many happy blessings and wishes for your bithday from me to you!!

Slyde said...

2 girls 1 shirt, huh?

i saw another version that sounded close to that but looked alot different.

Unknown said...

Random Musings- perogies do rock!

Porkstar- with wasabi mayo it's better than it sounds. Even though I'm going to steer clear for awhile.

Sarah-after clarification on my part, yes the second almost bachelor is who you are thinking about.

Wanderlust- I swear they make the drinks stronger here or something...

Lad Litter-24 hrs

Candy- thanks for the sweet words, right back atcha.

Slyde- I'm happy to report I haven't seen that one!

Bruce Johnson said...

You got golf clubs???? Geezzz, you ARE Loved....