Sunday, September 13, 2009

The VMA Wrap-Up Report

I don't know how to embed videos (seriously, a monkey chained to a laptop would probably have a better blogger skin, a more organized reader and VIDEOS) so there will be none of the VMA's but I'm sure many other bloggers will have them out and about. Or just go to Youtube and type in :Kanyne is a fucking twat. Or watch this...

But to summarize...

  • Madonna's tribute to Michael Jackson was a class act and I think this brought Janet Jackson closer to a comeback than she has seen in years. There were tears and I won't apologize for any of them. You forget about the days when Madonna, Michael and Janet ruled the stage based on choreography not gimmicks. Oh and now that I have the basics of Thriller down my new life goal is to learn the choreography for 'Scream'.

  • Kate Perry+Joe Perry intro. Perry. PERRY! Get it? Get it? Yeah, Katie Perry and a Queen cover go together like shit and a blender.

  • Russel Brand. 2ND year hosting. Still waiting for the funny.

  • Lady Gaga, there is fashion, there is art and then there is looking like a damn fool. You crossed than line with your second outfit. A face mask? Meh, bad but if Slipknot can do it. why not you. But looking like the dominoes guy on purpose? That's not art. That's just bad form. And a feather face do-hickey? That's one step away from stapling a damned live duck to a headband and acting as it it's just another day with a duck stapled to your head for fashion. But you were fierce and creepy during your performance and god knows I respect creepy.

  • Kayne is dead to me. If I was Taylor Swift I would have said something when he was being a drunk cunt. And by said something I mean punched him in the head. It would have been worth any night spent in jail. His opinion is not the only one that matter and in fact it doesn't matter at all as you can see by the booing his name brought the rest of the night. I still swear his mother would be ashamed if she saw the way he acted. It was not the time nor the place and he proved his character. It placed a shadow over the rest of the eve.

  • Green Day aren't relevant anymore. They just aren't.

  • Is it just me or does Eminem look like he aged about ten years in the last two, but finally grew up in a good way?

  • Kirsten Stewart looked good. And like she showered. Coincidence? I think not.

  • Speaking of Kirsten's, is Kirsten Cavallari not dead yet? Really? Oh.

  • New Moon Trailer=instant female boner

  • Wearing a stupid outfit doesn't make you look younger, hipper, or like less of a bitch. Yes, I'm talking to you J-lo.

  • Muse is sex.

  • I've never been a Beyonce fan but her performance was stunning and giving up her speech at the end of the night so Taylor Swift could have her moment was a classy move.

  • Ooops. Repeat outfit alert. Think if either Pink of Shakira asked nicely they could borrow a headpiece from Lady Gaga and make a tube dress out of it?

  • Jay-z is like a fine wine of hip hop that keeps getting better with age and I just wanna chug a quart of him. The man has charisma during his live shows but I could feel this one through the tele.

And that's all. This is Meghan, your VMA 2009 correspondent signing off.


Steph said...

Oh but how I heart Lady Gaga. Bitch is certifiably insane but I LOVE HER and her whacky fashions.

Kanye is a wanker, and Eminem is heading that way, his aging has to do with the shit loads of drugs the guys does (according to Mariah Carey lol)

MsDarkstar said...

I don't have a TV but did catch a clip of the Kanye disrespecting Taylor bit. There are not enough apologies in the world to make up for that and while I am not a big Beyonce fan, if she gave up her time to Taylor then you're right, that was a class act.

I know Kanye will never apologize and while I wasn't a fan before, I will definitely go out of my way to NOT see anything he ever does now.

P said...

Hahaha, awesome! I love this kind of recap, you should do them more often.

And a PS - when the words are that good, you don't need a better skin or videos. Just saying... ;)

Kirsty said...

Love the comments! Haven't seen the coverage yet - I think we're getting it here tonight.
I agree about Lady Gaga. But must stick up for Russell B! I dunno - I kinda find everything that comes out of his mouth funny, but I love that dandyish caustic humour.
Greenday - agreed. Kirsten Stewart - could definitely do with more regular bathing. Jay-Z - bring out the barrel.
Going to go and watch Kanye make a twat of himself now. Sigh.

Organic Meatbag said...

Kanye is most definitely a bitter cocksucker...

Anonymous said...

I don't know how Taylor Swift maintained her composure, but for someone of her age, she is purely class. I would've given him the side hammer- f*cking douchenozzle.

little erin said...

ha too funny!
thank you for my birthday message!!!

Children of the 90s said...

There was a whole lotta crazy going on last night, I'll give you that. Kanye is generally pretty ridiculous. It doesn't even surprise people anymoe.

Slyde said...

ive opined many times on my blog how i think kanye is nothing but an asshat. i hate him.

LiLu said...

I freaking love every word of this. SPOT. the fuck. ON.

Andy said...

Damn it. I haven't been able to see them because I have no fucking decent television. Why do the French hate MTV? WHYYY?

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

LOL. Loved this recap.

I fell asleep and missed Beyonces classy speech even though I really wanted to see it.

Really, really, really NOT a Twilight fan BUT the New Moon trailer looks pretty good.

I hate Kristen Stewart. With a passion.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...


Kimberly said...

Shakira looked good. Pink - her outfit, it went with her act.

Katy Perry is the stuff & ole' Joe still has it.

I agree about Russell Brand.

I agree 100% about Madonna's tribute to MJ. And damn if she didn't look - she was totally pulled together.

Beyonce has total class.

Racquel Valencia said...

Fuck Taylor Swift.

Kanye has helped her career more than her pathetic little tunes about Shakespeare and tears on guitars ever could have.


But seriously.

Also, she maintained her composure because the first half of her "live" performance was prerecorded.

I'm just being devil's advocate, here, Kanye knows how to play the game.

Meghan said...

Steph-yay, god I've missed you and your comments.

MsDarkstar-I think a lot of people feel the same way.

P- it's not the size of my blog that counts it's how I use it...

Kirsty-Russell B was pretty funny in Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

Organic Meatbag- ne words for Kanyne, "cockass" and "douchenugget". Feel free to use freely.

Kelsey- and he would have deserved it.

Little Erin- anytime, lovely.

Children of the 90's-agreed, it was more of a "fuck, what this time."

Slyde- at least now you're part of the majority.

Lilu- thanks :)

Andy- youtube the highlights anf you'll get the gist.

Amber- agreed, there is something about her that is very unlikeable.

Chelsea- is it bad that she's on my list of celebrities I wouldn't care if got shanked?

Kimberly-Madonna does pulls off demure surprisingly well.

Racquel-agree this is better publicity than Taylor could have ever hoped for.

Julie said...

Kanye sucks, and I'm glad that Jay Leno asked him about his Mom and made him cry. Hasn't he ever heard that expression that goes something like "If your grandma/mom would be ashamed of it, don't do it"? Jerk.

I love Lady Gaga. She is RIDICULOUS when it comes to fashion... well, insane really, but I love her music.

Bruce said...

Lady GaGa and Kanye West are two of the prime examples of why I no longer listen to conteporary music. I am currently rediscovering late 1950s rockabilly / swing and trance-techno.

Meghan said...

Julie- is it bad that I started ti smirk when I saw Kanye cry? Wait, probably not.

Bruce- not a bad era to rediscover.

Jamie said...

We are so on the same page with a lot of this.

I love Gaga though. And wanted to murder Katy Perry for thinking she could cover that. Bitch.