Stick a Fork in It, Cause I'm Done

With NaBloPoMo. 30 posts. 30 days. Thanks for sticking it out with me. Even though at some point the posts were a bit painful to write, and certainly even more painful to read, it was well worth it.

It was an amazing writing exercise that allowed me to stop stressing so much about each post being "spot on" and just enjoy sharing the sometimes silly, sometimes melancholy thoughts that run through my head. If a post sucks, it doesn't mean I suck at life and should shut down my blog. Wait til another day and click the publish button. If a post doesn't get tons of comments, oh well, write another one and maybe that one will resonate with readers.

Not every post has to have a theme or a happy ending or a corresponding photo and that's alright. As well, comments are gifts, not validation. I appreciate everyone who has stuck with me for the last month, and it allowed me to focus more on the writing rather than watching comments build until I find it to be a suitable number. I would encourage anyone to do it at some point, and if you do you know I'll read along to see what all you have to say. Does this mean I'm going to continue posting daily? Hells to the no. But does this mean I'm going to strive for consistency in writing and commenting? Yes. So all in all the mission was a success.

Also a shoutout to my girl Paula who managed to conquer NaBloPoMo as well. You're a rock star, and a terrific writer and I'm proud of you girl.

Tis The Season

To elbow people at malls, go to ugly sweater parties and finally get rid of that god awful Movember mo' that's making my guy friends look like Where's Waldo with a restraining order.

Oh, and of course Christmas stuff. When not suckling at the teet of Starbucks Eggnog Lattes in their fiery cups I've been know to enjoy a mulled wine or two. Or in the case of last year's workplace Christmas banquet, a bottle or two. Followed by tucking the skirt into my nylons. In the front. And chatting with the boss and his wife.

Yeah. Anyways.

So I thought since it's the season of sharing I'd show you a few of my personal holiday drink recipes from my liquor stash so that you can report back with your own trainwrecky stories of mistletoe stapled to belts and making out with the janitor at your own workplace soiree.

Rum Eggnog
1 container of store bought eggnog.
Good quality amber rum
A glass.

Pour rum into the bottom of a glass. Roughly one third of the glass, but more or less to taste. Add eggnog. Be festive and add a sprinkling of nutmeg. Not too much, that shit is potent. Stir and enjoy.

Mulled Wine
1 bottle of red wine. Don't get all fancy shit on me, the 7$ bottle will do.
1 cup apple cider. Without alcohol. We're making mulled wine, not moonshine.
A blob of honey. No more, no less.
A small handful of cloves. Note I have tiny hands.
A handful of cinnamon sticks.
Some orange slices.

Throw all ingredients into a pot, and simmer on the stove for 20 minutes. Note I say SIMMER. The heat must be low or the alcohol will burn out and then you might as well feed it to the dog or get high on the leftover nutmeg from the eggnog.

Candycane Martini
Vodka.
Peppermint schnapps.
Candy Cane for garnish.

Measure out 3 ounces of vodka. Put two into a martini glass. Take the other one as a shot. Don't be a pussy, do it. Burns right? But in a good way. It's okay to like it.Throw in one ounce of peppermint scnapps. Use a candy cane as garnish and to stir your drink. Cause you're classy like that.

I hope these recipes fair you well into the New Year and encourage you to go to your local mall and sit on Santa's lap and tell him whatcha really want for Christmas.

P.S. Don't forget the giveaway on my 200th post is still open til Wed night.

Hello, Is Anybody Out There?

Between American Thanksgiving and Black Friday it seems like blogger world is quiet right now. Of course this is the weekend I pick to do a giveaway. Figures.

Shrug.

200th Post+ Giveaway!

Thank you.

It's been a long haul, and I don't say it enough, but thank you.

I started this blog three years ago for a plethora of reasons, I have gone over but also because before this blog I honestly thought noone read blogs other than friends back home looking for updates. Then I stumbled across Steph who I still think holds the bar and she was sharing hilarious stories, and painful truths and there was a whole community of bloggers supporting and each other.

Then came 20sb and I fell down the rabbit hole to this wonderful and wacky world.

It's hard to believe in 200 posts, I've been through 2 jobs. 2 apartments. 2 relationships (I'm starting to see a pattern here), and one broken heart.

Facing the hardest thing, and dealing with mental problems head on. Dealing with fears, and near death experiences. Addressing friendships solidified, and friendships changed. Spur of the moment trips, and falling from the sky. Oh and lets not forget that I'm on my third car since I started this thing.

More bad dates and trainwrecking nights than my archives would like to justify. Sharing waaaaay too much information, lonely nights, and hungover morning. Oh and you were there when I met Tinkerbell, on numerous birthdays, and have dealt with a couple blog breaks. Over the last year I have met a couple of bloggers, and hope to one day meet more.

Throughout this blog I have changed as a person. Throughout my twenties I have had a pretty good grasp of self, but through applying it to this blog it's given me confidence in my choices, my truth, and myself.

It's been a wild ride, but honestly for all the times I've had writers blocks, and days of frustration and thoughts of quitting, I always come back. Because it's not about simply entertainment and validation, it's become about friendships and release.

It's hard to believe I've gotten to 200, and lord knows if I'll get 200 more out of this, but all in all, I know I wouldn't have done it if not for you, so I have to say, from the bottom of my heart,

Thank you.

.....so now onto the good stuff. I wanted to give something back to say thanks for reading, and to continue to read so I have a 15 dollar ITunes Giftcard and 10dollar Starbucks giftcard* to send away to one lucky reader. You know the routine.
Comment= one entry.
Tweet and link it back= 2 entries.
Become a follower*= 3rd chance to win.

You have til next Wednesday. Good luck!

*That's all that I can afford. It's Christmas and I'm broke/don't have blog sponsors.
*Current followers already are counted for one entry.

....200th Post Tomorrow

Yup, that's about it ;)

Single Goggles

Single goggles are cousins to the beer goggles and are infact interchangable and sometimes easily swapped. But whereas beer goggles fog your vision to make the opposite sex funnier, sexier and worthwhile of relations, single goggles are trickier.

You see beer googles happen within a twenty four hour period and are akin to sunglasses at night and when ripped off in the morning light, slap you in the face with the mistake made in the sense of someone who's drivers license you look at while in the washroom and promise to friend on facebook.

But single goggles are goggles you have on all the time but fog up over time. The prescription gets stronger the longer you go without kissing, dates, and "relations". They make you question that ex you broke up with years ago and think that their drug problem really isn't that much of a dealbreaker. They make you look at that guy at the party with the limp and the unibrow and wonder if maybe he has great character and personality other women haven't discovered yet. They make you eyeball men at the grocery store and see if their groceries are similar to yours and if this is enough for a conversation starter. That guy on the dating site that has 'n/a' under profession could just be mysterious, and that guy at the bar with the Ed Hardy shirt....well that's where I draw the line.

But the single goggles are glasses that come on after a certain point of singleness, and the prescription gets deceptively stronger over time which is why you need the advice of a wingman. Not the beer goggle wingman, those have a whole other set of wingman rules I'll go over at some point. But the single goggles wingman will coax you from texting that guy that asked for your number and failed to follow through. They'll verbally (and physically if need be) slap you across the face if you think about taking him back just one more time, cause it's just soooooooooo comfortable with him. They'll encourage you to date, but won't let you scrape the bottom of the barrel just so you can at least feel like SOMEONE wants to take you out for coffee.

I think it's safe to say we've all wore a pair of single goggles at some point or another. Have you ever worn them or been a wingman for a friend with single goggles?

Kareoke, Anyone?

It's not Wayne's World, but it should give you a chuckle for the night.

Quantity vs Quality

I warned you all that I'm stubborn. Maybe it's the red hair, maybe it's the fact that I get what I want and maybe it's both sprinkled with the fact that I can be a tichy bit batshitinsane at times.

But in the good way, of course.

So it's no surprise that some of my posts have gone down in quality and at this point if this was an essay I'd be handing it into the instructor with a sheepish smile hoping the Super Cool title page will bump it up to a C+ even though the writing is more of a C quality.

Does this mean I'm embarrassed by the quality here? Yup. Does it mean that I'm going to resort to boob shots and a KD recipe post? Probably. Does it still give me incentive to do my 200TH BLOG POST+ GIVEAWAY on Friday (a little selfless promotion works), of course.

Does this mean I'm going to give up NaBloPoMo? Nope. Because I'm sticking through this to the end. And if I have to resort to pictures of my cat/jazz hand Vlog posts or seeking out adventures on the streets for a C+ on this project, so be it.

That or I'll just drunk post for some extra credit.

A Throwback to College Town

My friend Al (Alistair when I'm feeling refined) is passing through town and has placed himself at home at my place for the evening. He's currently watching the hockey game, while well fed and I'm surfing the internet. And although the food I fed him is a little healthier than in college and our night tamer than others, I'd be lying if it's not a throwback. Often in college Al would be over at our place eating Kraft Dinner, drinking beer and watching the game. Lives and locations change, but sometimes it's easy to go back to a routine you didn't even know is ingrained.

So to celebrate, I'm going to jack a few of the quotes off my friend Nick's blog from when we were all in college, cause we may be a little older, and a little wiser, but underneath it all, we're still saying the same stupid shit years later...

"What we need to do is torch the classrooms, burn down the clocktower, and murder our teachers." - Melissa

"If you cry and bake cakes you can manipulate people." - Melissa

"It's friday, I'm naked and I'm drinking. It's a good day." - Meghan

"I'm going to go up to random people and go 'Word to your mother!'...see how many time I get punched out." - Meghan

"I'm a worthless piece of skin!" - Al

Al: What kind of party ends at 1 AM?
Nick: The kind that starts at noon.

Do You Wanna Shag Now, Or Shag Later?

I just watched Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me.( the best of the trilogy) and have concluded that at the two parties I am going to tonight, I shall only introduce myself as Ivanna Humpalot.

This shall have no dire consequences in the morning, certainly.